


Tonight

by afteriwake



Series: Sherlolly Spring Fling - April/May 2017 [41]
Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Angst and Feels, Established Sherlock Holmes/Molly Hooper, F/M, Implied Sexual Content, Inspired by Music, Last Kiss, Last Night Together, POV Molly Hooper, Post-Episode: s03e03 His Last Vow, Relationship History, Secret Relationship, thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-24
Updated: 2017-09-24
Packaged: 2019-01-05 02:51:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12181476
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/afteriwake/pseuds/afteriwake
Summary: Tonight is all they'll have, really, before he dies.





	Tonight

**Author's Note:**

  * For [angelsong87](https://archiveofourown.org/users/angelsong87/gifts).



> Ages ago (I don't know where) **sherlollyistheshit** suggested on Tumblr the song "One Last Time" by Jaymes Young for a Sherlolly fic, and I made note of it, and eventually **angelsong87** claimed it for Sherlolly Spring Fling and I am _just_ now getting around to posting it.

She was surprised he had asked to see her. She was even more surprised she was allowed to stay overnight. She had the feeling Mycroft had not known the true nature of their relationship, even with all the surveillance she knew Sherlock was under, or else he would never have allowed it. But she was spending his last night in London in his arms, and there was no place else she would rather be.

Oh, they never should have started a relationship. It had all began under circumstances she would rather have had be different. Tom had known, after John and Mary’s wedding, that she wasn’t over Sherlock. He had known it so much more clearly than she did because she vehemently denied she loved Sherlock. But he had been adamant and said he wanted all of her heart and there was no way he would have it, not with Sherlock in London, not with them being friends. But he’d loved her, he did, and bowed out so her heart could have what it wanted.

But oh, she had been so angry at Sherlock. So angry at him for ruining everything, and she had gone to Baker Street to yell, to be angry _at_ him, and it had just taken one look at his face, with the sad eyes when she blamed him for everything that she stopped. She stopped because the truth hit her like a ton of bricks: he was sad she had lost what she wanted, but what she wanted was _him_. It had been for so long and Tom was right and she had felt awful.

And then she started crying.

There had been nothing but comfort that night, but she had felt so disgusted with herself for what she had done, and even worse waking up in the morning being held close by Sherlock. Guilt had eaten at her; though she had never cheated, not really, she had let Sherlock slip back into her heart like a thief in the night and hurt a good man in the process. She didn’t want to see Sherlock again, not for some time, and so she left before he woke up.

Then it had been distance, not talking, and she found out later he’d started in on his case against Magnussen, cozying up to Janine. And, of course, there was the row in the labs, and the last thing she had thought was her life would be so much better if Sherlock was just gone.

Unfortunately, she almost got her wish.

It wasn’t until Mary and John’s separation that she saw him more. John was at Baker Street, Mary was at their home, and she and Sherlock shuttled between the two trying to keep friendships alive. Eventually, it just happened that her home was a safe zone, a place for the two of them to just relax. Slowly, the two of them went from friends who had become strangers to friends again to...more.

And the timing couldn’t have been worse. They had only been more for a short time before he threw it all away.

Oh, she knew he would do anything for John and Mary, and perhaps they were, in the end, more important than her. She counted, but they mattered. And all she would have was tonight before the hole in her heart would come round again, this time to never be filled.

_I’m leaving_  
_This cold world of mine_  
_No pleading_  
_Is gonna turn back time_

She held him closer as the ghost of music on the radio slipped over them. She didn’t want him to go. She knew he wasn’t going to come back. This was a one-way trip, she had been told. His penance for his crime.

She wondered if it was worth it. If taking that horrible man’s life had been worth it. And as he stirred, looking at her with half-tired eyes, his brief rest was over, she felt it wasn’t. It would never be worth it. And when he kissed her, rolling her onto her back as he covered her, she wondered just how long she would last before her broken heart got the better of her and she joined him. How she loved this man so much, she would never know, but tonight, she almost wished she didn’t.

Because tonight would be all they really had, in the end.

_Could I feel your skin on mine_  
_Before I have to say goodbye_  
_Could I breathe, please, one last time_  
_You’re in my lungs before I curl up_  
_And die_  
_All my world is losin’ light_


End file.
